i hate new york. well, not really, but im definately developing a bit of a love-hate thing about the place. maybe its because im londoner... etc. today and tried to go and queue up for free tickets to see shakespeare in central park and then proceeded to get mightily lost trying to get there. there was some stupid puerto carnival following me around so that all the entrances to central park seemed to be shut and then i accidentally ended up on a transverse from which there was no exit. (ooh just as an interjection theyre playing the new buick advert on the tv and the soundtrack is lyrical gangster. that song should come back) still at least its not raining for once and i'm not sure if i can handle shakespeare in an american accent. i ate a brownie. it partly cheered me up, then i went and bought some records from other music which is pretty much nyc's answer to sounds of the universe to complete the process. other things that annoy me - the weather is really unpredctable. i know this sounds stupid coming from an englishwoman but i think i have developed i bit of a 6th sense regarding the weather back home so i know if its going to rain or not. also new yorkers always dress up - sex and the city is actually accurate in regards to this - and it itimidates me. and the women here are so unbelieveably prepubescently thin. i really have never seen such thin people in my life. i want to force fried chicken down their mouths and then drown them in a pot of molton lard. i actually mistook a 12 year-old for a new york woman the other day whilst giving her a dirty look. they dont have escalators on the subway. come on, this is america! admitedly though the subway is not that far underground. you can hear rumbling below whilst walking along the street which is kind of cool. umm, ill try and quit moaning now.
lets have an art update, i went to PS1 which is an fantastic space and appropriately huge. they have been collating a collection of wll works in the myriad warehouse stairwells, including a cecily brown with the paint peeling off which is the best thing ive seen by her. the new (contemporary) museum had a group show of international artists below the age of 33 (the younger than jesus generation). most of the work was pretty bad actually including, predictably, the painting but it was interesting and well curated. the best piece was a ryan gander that involved the gallery attendant wearing a white addidas tracksuit with a blood stain on it. now for the prerequisite food and drink comments. i had a hot dog around 4am. it was amazing. i tried to eat a breakfast cereal called apple zines. it was painful. i also asked my friend, who is from great kills (what a name), statten island and then in my eyes a bonafied new yorker whay the big apple is thus called and got the reply that 'they grew apples once somewhere upstate i think'. classic. i did go out on the town one night and stayed up late, new york style til 5am. how i managed this i dont know since i went to all of 3 bars and had one drink in each. i think we spent a long time larking around in times square, which is very pretty in the nightime. proudly, i discovered a really cool place called the mars bar which was this filthy hole in the wall full of squat art and old school punks getting grumpy at one another. it also had the worlds most punk juke box - it was covered in grafitti, the track listings were hand scrawled and when you gave it a dolar and selected your choice of track it played what hell it wanted. i must admit though my desolute corner of brooklyn was eerily beautiful in the pre-dawn light, still in way new york rarely is i guess.
Sunday, 14 June 2009
Thursday, 11 June 2009
New York (Is Red Hot)
actually its not. its cold and rainy. so yeah, ive finally made it to my last port of call. i was on the greyhound and we went through the EZ pass onto the new jersey turnpike and i was like oh my god a familiar landscape. i have not known you in so long. literally everything ive seen for the past 2 months (minus my family) has been new to me. im staying in a warehouse convert in east williamsburg, so yes, its twat central here. it has an astro turf garden though which is cooler than it sounds. on first arrival i was like help me, shoreditch has imploded all over the place but im gradually getting used to being back in a 'proper city'. although i still cant handle the price of groceries in the hipster organic store. i also keep on getting on the wrong subway train. can't they employ a designer to sort it out or something. perhaps i should pay attention though,. that would help.
today i had an art binge. i went to the new MOMA (i say new because it wasn't open when i was last in new york but its actually been a few years now). it was horrific, mostly because of the hoards of tourists and school parties everywhere but even so the permanent collection hang i think is the worst ive ever seen. when it first was hung it was done thematically and it caused such outrage theyve down returned it too the most boring chronologic hang imiginable as a punishment for everyone being so narrow minded. nice temporary show of drawings from the collection though. the whitney is better on almost every level although the main show about to open was the same dan graham exhibition i saw at MOCA in LA. so there you have it - i travel at about the same speed as a major touring retrospective. i had another case of deja-vu last night in the hostel when a met a girl from south london who seemed earily familiar. after a bit of discussion it turnedout we had met before a couple of years ago when we both had longer hair. bit depressing actually, its like ive met all the people i could possibly meet in the world and now i just have to recycle old ones.
today i had an art binge. i went to the new MOMA (i say new because it wasn't open when i was last in new york but its actually been a few years now). it was horrific, mostly because of the hoards of tourists and school parties everywhere but even so the permanent collection hang i think is the worst ive ever seen. when it first was hung it was done thematically and it caused such outrage theyve down returned it too the most boring chronologic hang imiginable as a punishment for everyone being so narrow minded. nice temporary show of drawings from the collection though. the whitney is better on almost every level although the main show about to open was the same dan graham exhibition i saw at MOCA in LA. so there you have it - i travel at about the same speed as a major touring retrospective. i had another case of deja-vu last night in the hostel when a met a girl from south london who seemed earily familiar. after a bit of discussion it turnedout we had met before a couple of years ago when we both had longer hair. bit depressing actually, its like ive met all the people i could possibly meet in the world and now i just have to recycle old ones.
Monday, 8 June 2009
Further Adventures From Steel City
other things invented in pittsburgh, the jeep and the big mac. talking of burgers on nbs they were broadcasting the zagat restaurant guide to fast food and out of all the chains guess who swept the board including winning best overall and best burger? yes – wendys. it truly is amazing. i knew it. today i went to a diner chain called park called eat and park which was famously launched in pittsburgh. you’d think it would be park n eat, not the other way round but there you go. i had a shredded bbq pork burger. it was pretty good. it came with onion rings inside it! shredded pork is awesome anyhow. i first came across it on top of some nachos and I thought it was tuna initially. its like totally melt in the mouth.
they also have the worlds first university building skyscraper here. it was first built in the 30s and theres only one taller in the world, at moscow university, so the idea of sky high education didnt really take off. still its quite impressive as its done in a gothic style and is called the cathedral of learning. still whats really neat (how on earth did i survive before i started peppering my education with words such as cute and neat? on one level i am discusted with myself) is that each immigrant group has furnished a classroom inside in the national style. furnished perhaps is an understament, architects and imported craftsman were involved. for example the english classroom is panneled in oak in the tudor gothic style with a stone fireplace, stained glass and furniture from the houses of parliment. if you want to go on a tour, they give you a key and you go round the building which really is like a cathedral inside with vaults and heavy wood doors. its like being in gormenghast (or harry potter perhaps for the less literary of you). they are still constructing more of these international rooms. with the recent ones its all got a bit competitive and gone over the top but the early ones are quite charming.
they also have the worlds first university building skyscraper here. it was first built in the 30s and theres only one taller in the world, at moscow university, so the idea of sky high education didnt really take off. still its quite impressive as its done in a gothic style and is called the cathedral of learning. still whats really neat (how on earth did i survive before i started peppering my education with words such as cute and neat? on one level i am discusted with myself) is that each immigrant group has furnished a classroom inside in the national style. furnished perhaps is an understament, architects and imported craftsman were involved. for example the english classroom is panneled in oak in the tudor gothic style with a stone fireplace, stained glass and furniture from the houses of parliment. if you want to go on a tour, they give you a key and you go round the building which really is like a cathedral inside with vaults and heavy wood doors. its like being in gormenghast (or harry potter perhaps for the less literary of you). they are still constructing more of these international rooms. with the recent ones its all got a bit competitive and gone over the top but the early ones are quite charming.
Saturday, 6 June 2009
Pittsburgh
ok just to warn you now im writing this while watching a repeat of the mtv awards. Some one from high school musical 3 has just beaten frida pinto to best breakthrough female performance – i mean is there no justice in this world? so yes just to warn you in case of interjections. Im in pittsburgh at the moment in my uncles very handsome house. actually im going to have to hurry up and upload some photos just so i can show off because the view is amazing. i like pittsburgh a lot. its very blue collar and down to earth with layers upon layers of industrial architecture. theres also an excellent contemporary arts scene, probably because its so cheap here. actually it reminds me a bit of berlin before it got posh. back in the day they called pittsburgh the birmingham of america. i think that’s a bit harsh.
theres an art gallery called the mattress factory which is apparently the best contemporary art gallery in the country. i can believe it. there was a piece that involved the viewer sitting in almost pitch black room for 15 minutes. i think i was there longer as my perception of time passing is not great. have you ever sat in pitch darkness? its weird because you cant actually see anything but you can kind of sense theres some space out there and if you move your hand you cant see your hand but you can just aboiut sense there something moving. the whole space just seem to undulate around you n(ok mtv update: robert patterson, actually quite hot. is that wrong? also eminems performance looks like hes just going through the motions probably because hes thinking how much he could do with some diazepam. Sorry is that bad taste) hey so yes after that experience i was just tripped out by everything i saw so i cant really give you a decent account. there was some neat site-specific work though. also in that area is this crazy house that has been painted and decorated all over. google randyland, pittsburgh. I met randy – he was intense.
everyone is sports mad in pittsburgh. at the moment the hockey team has some important games and even the buses bare the legend lets go pens (will farrell what are you doing?). the team being called the penguins. ice hockey is a bit weird anyway. They sort of play tests like in cricket so it all goes on for days. they have the pennsylvania sports museum here too but i wasn’t brave enough to bare it. speaking of pennsylvania i think i saw an amish on the bus! obviously greyhound buses count as pre-industrial methods of transportation. (oohoh ive just witness the infamous sacha baran cohen/eminem moment – totally a set up) . anyway lots of things were invented in pittsburgh. heres a list of some of them; the polio vaccination, steal rope, commercial aluminium production, commercial glass production, modern train brakes, czecheslovakia, heinz 57 varities. the 57 was just plucked from the middle of nowhere by the way.
my new guilty pleasure is paris hiltons new bff. have you seen the way she walks? its incredible. (argh ive just witnessed lyanne rymes murder i jizzed in my pants. murder i tell you murder)
theres an art gallery called the mattress factory which is apparently the best contemporary art gallery in the country. i can believe it. there was a piece that involved the viewer sitting in almost pitch black room for 15 minutes. i think i was there longer as my perception of time passing is not great. have you ever sat in pitch darkness? its weird because you cant actually see anything but you can kind of sense theres some space out there and if you move your hand you cant see your hand but you can just aboiut sense there something moving. the whole space just seem to undulate around you n(ok mtv update: robert patterson, actually quite hot. is that wrong? also eminems performance looks like hes just going through the motions probably because hes thinking how much he could do with some diazepam. Sorry is that bad taste) hey so yes after that experience i was just tripped out by everything i saw so i cant really give you a decent account. there was some neat site-specific work though. also in that area is this crazy house that has been painted and decorated all over. google randyland, pittsburgh. I met randy – he was intense.
everyone is sports mad in pittsburgh. at the moment the hockey team has some important games and even the buses bare the legend lets go pens (will farrell what are you doing?). the team being called the penguins. ice hockey is a bit weird anyway. They sort of play tests like in cricket so it all goes on for days. they have the pennsylvania sports museum here too but i wasn’t brave enough to bare it. speaking of pennsylvania i think i saw an amish on the bus! obviously greyhound buses count as pre-industrial methods of transportation. (oohoh ive just witness the infamous sacha baran cohen/eminem moment – totally a set up) . anyway lots of things were invented in pittsburgh. heres a list of some of them; the polio vaccination, steal rope, commercial aluminium production, commercial glass production, modern train brakes, czecheslovakia, heinz 57 varities. the 57 was just plucked from the middle of nowhere by the way.
my new guilty pleasure is paris hiltons new bff. have you seen the way she walks? its incredible. (argh ive just witnessed lyanne rymes murder i jizzed in my pants. murder i tell you murder)
Wednesday, 3 June 2009
I Finally Make It To The Atlantic
firstly, my apologies for the lack of posts lately. ive been hanging with my family in north carolina and generally enjoying being fed. i did mean to catch up yesterday but i spent the whole day sleeping and watching the fresh prince of bel-air instead. i think jazz is my ideal man by the way. so places ive been... charleston which is very pretty but kinda boring. i think my main issue was that is quite a high class holiday resort and i was running out of money and couldnt afford to do anything. it is very attractive thou, all colonial architecture and palmetto trees. the palmetto tree is the state tree of south carolina and an adopted symbol of the confederacy (aka the lost cause) and hence is everywhere. i was slightly disturbed by the fact you can buy gollywog dolls in the market. ok i had a gollywog doll when i was little but 1 this was back in the day 2 shrewsbury is behind the times anyway 3 id never even seen a black person before the age of 5 let alone know that my gollywog was meant to represent one. my cousin lives in raleigh , north carolina and goes to college in nearby chapel hill also home to ben folds and ryan adams. now her school, ncu, its nickname is the tar heals so naturally im like - oh whys that that. - oh back in the civil war some people waded through a tar field and then fought a battle. - what battle? - dunno. - are there a lot of tar fields in north carolina? - dont think so. this was the best answer i could get. other people were like oh its lost in the mists of time. the civil war is not the mists of time guys. it was like 1862, you should know what happened and what tar had to do with it.
and of course there are my further culinary adventures. i had krispy kreme for the first time. they are from winsten salem nc also home of morovian sugar cake which is amazing too. theres definately something in the water there. now ive had dunkin' doughnuts before which are from boston and they were disappointing. in the battle for the doughnut, the south definately wins. krispy kreme was everything and more i imagined a doughnut to be. we went at midnight when the 'hot sign ' is on and its like eating air - hot sweet doughy glazed air that is. they simply melt on your tongue and you get to watch them rise in the open kitchen. ah now i cant even think what else ive eaten, im just daydreaming about doughnuts. oh yeah i had frozen yoghurt for the first time. i was expecting it to taste of yoghurt - it doesnt. its just ice cream. and my cousin and her boyfriend looked at me like i was crazy when i said this. then i said so if you wanted your froen yoghurt to taste of yoghurt you'd have to order yoghurt flavour frozen yoghurt and they looked at me like i should be sectioned. i also had this thing called bubble tea - i was expecting carbonated iced tea. no its actually a smoothie with lumps of tapioca in it. i couldnt quite handle the tapioca. its a bit weird.
i also have been on the craziest greyhound. now riding the greyhound is a bit like being on a school bus. the driver tells you off over the announcer if you make too much noise. on the bus from memphis to atlanta the bus driver was like - if yo' havin problem with yo' baby mama or yo' baby daddy no one on da bus needs to know. save it fo' nashville. anyway this bus from raleigh to dc had all the crazies on it. there was some drunk tramp who went to bathroom (brave as i am i must admit i have never ventured to go to the onboard restroom in all my travels) and had a cigarette. now this is not allowed and the bus driver was not happy and told the guy he would be kicked off at the next stop and off course the rest of the bus started weighing in with their opinions on the matter. anyway 20 minutes or so later the guy does it again, unbelievebly, and then tries to deny it even though you could smell the smoke and starts getting aggressive at the bus driver. so the driver kicks him off in the middle of the freeway. fair enough i say but all the bus is going ah you can't do that, you can't do that and the driver is like you lot better shut up or youre going to be joining him. i was trying hard not to laugh. also of great excitement at dc we saw, me for the first time despite my myriad journeys, a couple of the new fleet of buses and everyone went ooohhh, ahhhh etc. at the sight.
and of course there are my further culinary adventures. i had krispy kreme for the first time. they are from winsten salem nc also home of morovian sugar cake which is amazing too. theres definately something in the water there. now ive had dunkin' doughnuts before which are from boston and they were disappointing. in the battle for the doughnut, the south definately wins. krispy kreme was everything and more i imagined a doughnut to be. we went at midnight when the 'hot sign ' is on and its like eating air - hot sweet doughy glazed air that is. they simply melt on your tongue and you get to watch them rise in the open kitchen. ah now i cant even think what else ive eaten, im just daydreaming about doughnuts. oh yeah i had frozen yoghurt for the first time. i was expecting it to taste of yoghurt - it doesnt. its just ice cream. and my cousin and her boyfriend looked at me like i was crazy when i said this. then i said so if you wanted your froen yoghurt to taste of yoghurt you'd have to order yoghurt flavour frozen yoghurt and they looked at me like i should be sectioned. i also had this thing called bubble tea - i was expecting carbonated iced tea. no its actually a smoothie with lumps of tapioca in it. i couldnt quite handle the tapioca. its a bit weird.
i also have been on the craziest greyhound. now riding the greyhound is a bit like being on a school bus. the driver tells you off over the announcer if you make too much noise. on the bus from memphis to atlanta the bus driver was like - if yo' havin problem with yo' baby mama or yo' baby daddy no one on da bus needs to know. save it fo' nashville. anyway this bus from raleigh to dc had all the crazies on it. there was some drunk tramp who went to bathroom (brave as i am i must admit i have never ventured to go to the onboard restroom in all my travels) and had a cigarette. now this is not allowed and the bus driver was not happy and told the guy he would be kicked off at the next stop and off course the rest of the bus started weighing in with their opinions on the matter. anyway 20 minutes or so later the guy does it again, unbelievebly, and then tries to deny it even though you could smell the smoke and starts getting aggressive at the bus driver. so the driver kicks him off in the middle of the freeway. fair enough i say but all the bus is going ah you can't do that, you can't do that and the driver is like you lot better shut up or youre going to be joining him. i was trying hard not to laugh. also of great excitement at dc we saw, me for the first time despite my myriad journeys, a couple of the new fleet of buses and everyone went ooohhh, ahhhh etc. at the sight.
Tuesday, 26 May 2009
Food Post
yes its time for another one of these. firstly, ive tried a couple more fast food chains. i had a chicken burger from jack in the box. it was awesome. i was with an american who had somehow managed to go his whole life without having eaten jack in the box. he had a cheese burger with double cheese and i asked him what it was like. he was like, er not that special, tastes like a wendys. exactly says i -awesome. ive been to taco bell. the tacos arent that special but i had a cheesy bean meat burrito of the dollar menu and it was so good and pretty big too for a dollar. actually i shouldnt be writing this right now as it making me hungry. the only thing ive had to eat today other than breakfast (its now 7.30pm) was a moon pie. a moon pie is the proper name for a wagonwheel although this being the states it is significantly better and more pimping. do they still make wagonwheels back home? i havent seen one since primary school. i am still having troubles with american supermarkets. firstly, i have a curse meaning that i cant find them. admittedly this is more to do with the fact they are out of town as americans do not go in for cornershops. in fact they fail to grasp the concept of pooping to the shop. when i use this verb, people get very confused and i try to explain that all anyone does all day in london is pop to the shop for coke, milk, beer, newspaper etc. but they still stay bemused. also confusingly, staples that are cheap in england are expensive in the states such as bread, pasta, milk. cheese is insanely expensive even the sort of value cheese slices that cost 30p at home. ive been feeling withdrawal symptons. eggs however are dirt cheap at a dollar for a dozen large. also aisles upon aisles are used up with ready mixes. they have ready mix for everything - lasagne, stir fry, doughnuts, pilafs - but you have to add oil and milk and egg so i dont really understand who they are more convienient.
in the hostel in atlanta we all used to sit and watch the food channel on cable tv. im not exactly sure why, but for some reason it was considered everyones preference. the particular favourite was a programme called iron chef america which is a kind of cross between gladiator and ready steady cook. you can youtube it if you like - it has an amusing host and good food porn. now then because i got hungry ive just eaten some grits. grits is a traditional southern food that i thought i should try since there was some on the free food shelf in the hostel kitchen. grits are/is (i have yet to work out whether the word is singular or plural) savoury corn porridge. its a bit weird, im not sure if i like them on their own, theyre probably ok with a fry up. also i had instant ones so i guess home made would be better.
in the hostel in atlanta we all used to sit and watch the food channel on cable tv. im not exactly sure why, but for some reason it was considered everyones preference. the particular favourite was a programme called iron chef america which is a kind of cross between gladiator and ready steady cook. you can youtube it if you like - it has an amusing host and good food porn. now then because i got hungry ive just eaten some grits. grits is a traditional southern food that i thought i should try since there was some on the free food shelf in the hostel kitchen. grits are/is (i have yet to work out whether the word is singular or plural) savoury corn porridge. its a bit weird, im not sure if i like them on their own, theyre probably ok with a fry up. also i had instant ones so i guess home made would be better.
Monday, 25 May 2009
Corperate America
atlanta is home to two american institutions, coca-cola and CNN. it is also home to dr martin luther kings birthhome but i havent figured out how to make an interesting post out of that experience. now i was quite excited about going on a tour of CNN headquarters. ive got quite into it and its usually what thay screen on the tv while you wait for the greyhound. i find the cable news network strangely mesmerising when waiting for a bus at 2am. their headquarters are housed in a building which used to hold an indoor theme park and hence you get to satart your tour by ascending into a giant globe on the world's highest escalator. the tour itself is not that enlightening although i did discover they no longer use a green screen to do the weather which was a bit disappointing actally. none of the news rooms were very busy, probably because it was the friday afternoon of a bank holiday and everyone was lke do you think anything big going to break? nah, i mean main story is the hurricane in mexico so we can pretty much just leave that to CNN en espanol. i also went to the world of coca-cola which is a sort of museum/theme park/shrine to the marvel that is the coca-cola company. it presents the brand as a sort of magical religion that can solve all the worlds problems. i felt queasy at some points and not just from drinking too many free samples. thay say little about the developement of the 'secret formula' and even less about the corporations dubius use of 3rd world resources. the collection of memorabilia is good though and at the end you get to tastes coke products from around the world. i thought i was prepared for this. i thought foreign soft drinks all tasted like rubicon guava. no. the ones from africa were particularly foul, including fanta exotica. some of them werent even sweet. really soft drinks wiothout sugar do not work, i wanted spit some of them out. 2nd worst after africa, bizarrely, was north america (they organise by continent). i think its all the root beer variations. i dont understand root beer, it tastes like cough mixture and not in a good (calpol) way. you could also sample 'tab', cokes first attempt at a diet cola from the 70s. if you think coke zero tastes bad (which i do) you shouldve tasted tab.
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